As I glanced over this, I noticed a prevailing theme running through my entries -- I am tired, and I realized this must be the most boring blog in history. I have done a great deal of complaining that didn't happen before. My job is more stressful, my personal life of late has be more stressful and overall everything sucked! No wonder only two people read this.
Long time ago, when I started this I wanted to be creative and silly, now it is the place to put a voice to my all ills or elude to it least. I am not happy and my blog is reflecting that.
I am not sure that changing my job will make me happy - I believe the culture of the work place is hateful. So I will be just moving from one bad situation to another but staying put is not an option either. I have to try to better my situation.
Where's the creativity in my blogging? It's totally gone. It's amazing how you replay the bad stuff over and over in your mind and the good stuff never comes. With Barack Obama, pretending to be President, this blog should be filled with barb after barb. The drive for writing isn't there because I can't let go of the crap in my life and this saddens me.
When I turned 36, I turned my back on finding that someone special and quit the dating scene. I don't have patients for the game that is dating and honestly, I am afraid I am too blunt for it. Do I regret it? No not really, but there are realities to the single life that I didn't expect. For example: exploring the world is not option for me. I learned that sight-seeing and vacationing alone isn't my thing. I am a social creature and vacation for me have always be a social event. Also, world travel is expensive and you don't just grab a friend and run off to Ireland for the weekend.
Lately, I have come to the conclusion that life for me is something I have to endure, where most people embrace and experience all it has to offer. Now, don't call 911 (or 199 depending on where you live) I am not suicidal, just disappointed. I expected from more from life.
On a brighter note, I am trying to take back control in my life and that is through job searching, losing weight (one, you do better in job interviews if your not over-weight and two, it's either lose the weight or start smoking again and don't like being fat) and concentrating on enjoying the friendships I have and ignoring the bad. So in order to this effectively, it has to start here. No more bitching and moaning, anyone who reads my entries from this point forward has permission to scold whenever I go negative.
I also hope to get back to real blog entries not these two-sentences that take less time to read than it does for the web page to load. I am Dana! Hear me roar (just pray that tomorrow you're not hearing me whimper).
Enough for now.
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